Module 1 | XQ - Purpose
Purpose matters. All the science says it ... but ultimately it matters because you matter, and your purpose is what matters most to you.
I’ve heard it said that “Mission is what keeps you up at night ... but purpose is what gets you out of bed in the morning.”
Here’s to a new morning.
What In It For You
An introduction to what Purpose is
An overview of what influences your Purpose
A tool to help you discover your Purpose
Executive Summary
1. Purpose is your “WHY.” Why you are here (as a human being). Why you “do what you do” (i.e., what matters most to you).
2. Your Purpose is important for you as well as others. For you, it is not only essential for mental and emotional health, it serves as a “north star” for how you invest you life. For others it is a source of inspiration and empowerment, reflecting the innate need in humans to live communally.
3. Purpose comes from within ... you decide what it is. It is, however, influenced by a multitude of external influences including your context, significant relationships, and other life events.
4. You find your purpose through the hard work of self-reflection, exploration, and asking for help.
Let’s start with a quick quiz: What is Purpose?
No, but that was a really good effort.
Close! Wrong ... but close.
YOU GOT IT! Let’s take a closer look at what Purpose is.
Purpose Defined
The Oxford English Dictionary defines purpose as follows:
I see two primary concepts in this definition. Purpose is ...
1. The reason (or motivation) behind an action
2. The reason or meaning behind an existence
The common component of these two concepts is “the reason” for something. A reason indicates that a “choice” had to be made. Purpose is all about CHOICE
PURPOSE is the “WHY” behind your CHOICE
Why you are here (as a human being).
Why you “do what you do” (i.e., what matters most to you).
This can certainly lead to two obvious, but complex, questions:
1. Why am I here?
2. What does matter most to me?
These are difficult questions ... which lead us to another question:
Purpose’s Importance
I believe PURPOSE is important for two key reasons:
1. You need it.
2. Others need you.
Significantly, purpose is important for mental and emotional well-being.
Purpose helps shape your priorities and goals and influence how you allocate time and resources
It also can bring clarity to your decision-making, providing you with a sense of direction and focus.
Correct!
Human beings are social and communal beings. We thrive together and die in isolation. Our purpose, though deeply personal and ultimately fulfilling to us, is meant for the benefit of others.
* True fulfillment is never only about the self (Contrary to what Ayn Rand might argue). “Meaning and fulfillment” are “other-centered.” That basic instinct - to serve others - is at the heart of heroism.
* The lack of purpose in our society today is at the heart of a multitude of wrongs - global, social, relational, and personal. This lack drives people to find fulfillment in selfish pleasure and endeavors. It is the result of purpose when it is “self-centered.”
A survey by Gartner in January of 2022 found that the pandemic had caused Americans to turn inward to reevaluate “what matters most.” They found:
65% [of people] said the pandemic had made them rethink the place that work should have in their life.
56% said it made them want to contribute more to society.
This video (below), by Soul Pancake, shows different people wrestling with what Purpose is. Couple things worth noting:
1. The first man is 105. He believes that life still has purpose.
2. The people in between look at purpose in many different ways, but ultimately they come back to either self-centered or other-centered
2. The last woman is 84. Her words are wise.
It’s worth a few mintues to watch:
Purpose’s Source
Ultimately, purpose is something that we discover and define for ourself. It comes from within. However, there are also many influences on us that shape our purpose as well. Some of those include:
Beliefs
Goals
Family
Culture
Peer group expectations
Work
Relationships
If you think of others, I’d love to hear them. Send ‘em my way.
How To Find Purpose
Finding one's purpose in life can be a challenging and deeply personal process, and it may involve a combination of SELF-REFLECTION, EXPLORATION, and ASKING FOR HELP. Here are a few things in those categories that may be helpful to consider as you work to find your purpose:
Reflect on your values and passions
What is most important to you? What do you enjoy doing and find meaningful? These can be good starting points for identifying your purpose.
Consider your strengths and talents
What are you naturally good at? What do you enjoy doing that comes easily to you? These can also be clues to your purpose.
Experiment and try new things
It can be helpful to try out different activities, hobbies, and career paths to see what resonates with you. You may discover your purpose through this process of exploration.
Seek out mentors and role models
Look for people who are living their purpose and ask them about their journey. You may find inspiration and guidance from their experiences.
Seek help and support
Finding your purpose can be a challenging process, and it can be helpful to have the support of friends, family, or a therapist or coach. Don't be afraid to seek out help if you need it.
And remember,
... begins with one step.
Remember, finding your purpose is a journey, and it will take time and effort. Be patient with yourself, and give yourself grace if you don't find it right away. Keep exploring and reflecting. “Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay.”
Review
Purpose is the heart of who and why you are.
Purpose is important. It matters for you. You matter for others.
Finding your purpose takes work. It is also influenced by many things. If you are aware of those influences, you can make corrections as you need to.
The tools of finding purpose are self-reflection, exploration, and asking for help.
Exercises
1. Do you have a sense of what your purpose is? Write it down.
2. Revisit the section “Where does Purpose come from?”
If you have your purpose, do you see the influence of any of these”
If you don’t currently have a sense of what your purpose is, how might these influence what you value?
3. Revisit the sections “Self-reflection,” “Exploration,” and “Asking for Help.” These are your “tools” to begin to think about what your purpose might be. I recommend getting a journal to write.
What ever you do, just start.
Resources
These are some resources for helping you work through what your purpose may be. I’ve not fully worked through them all, but these seem most helpful. I do like Amy Morin’s work.
7 Tips for Finding Your Purpose in Life by Amy Morin
What is the Purpose of Life and How to Find Purpose In Life - Kevin Wood on LifeHack
How to Find Your Purpose in Life - Lyn Christian on SoulSalt
How To Find Your Life Purpose - Jack Canfield
References
Definition of “Purpose” is from the Oxford English Dictionary Google result.
All gifs from giphy.com